When your dreams become reality

**Warning: This post is gross. And embarrassing (for me). But I feel the need to share.**


***You have been warned.***



It's extremely hard to explain dreams.

Because normally your dream world is a combo of reality w/ other random pieces that don't belong.

Well, last night my dreamworld entered my real world.

I have been having this reoccurring dream the last couple of weeks where I get this nasty taste in my mouth and there's these stringy pieces with little chunks, like small seeds that I (excuse the nastiness) sort of hack up & spit out. My mouth fills up w/ saliva and these things & it's like I can't clear my mouth or throat. I spit, my mouth fills up again. I spit, there's more. Etc.

So I keep finding an empty trash can or some bathroom to spit the crap out (again, in the dream). Excuse my language.

The "string" pieces reminds me of when you get the stuff from sweet corn stuck in your teeth. In the dream, I pull them out but they're also attached across the roof of my mouth so it peels out really long (think like peeling a sunburn, it just keeps peeling & peeling....) and again, in "dream world" I kind of gag it up & spit it out.

**Sorry for the nasty details, I understand if you stop reading now or couldn't even make it through the last paragraph. Brace yourself, it's not over. I know you're so curious that even though you can't imagine why I'm telling you this - you're going to read to the end to see where the heck this is going.**

So anyway, I'm having a repeat of this dream last night. In these dreams I'm usually in a place like a high school where I keep ducking into bathroom stalls or locker rooms to hang over a garbage can or toilet. Sometimes I'm in a concert hall/auditorium type place where I'm supposed to be with a group of people but have to stay behind due to my.......issue.

In the dream I can't seem to get rid of the junk in my mouth, I keep hacking/spitting into the garbage, it does no good, there's still more there.

Then all of a sudden, last night while laying in bed having this dream, I feel spit/drool actually slide down my cheek.

I wasn't just doing this in my dream. I was doing this in real life.

Yep that's right. I was literally gagging & trying to clear out my mouth in my bed. As I am a back sleeper, there was no where else for it to go....


.....except down my cheek & neck.


**Sorry! I WARNED YOU!!!**


(This is sort of the climax of the story.....hope you weren't expecting more.)

Needless to say, at this point I woke up.

I went to the bathroom to clean myself off & change my t-shirt.

Then I realize that the nasty taste in my 'dream mouth' was a real taste I was having in actuality. It wasn't just a "dream" taste, it was a real life taste in my throat/mouth. Standing in the bathroom at 3:30 in the morning I tried not to gag again.

I've deduced from my long analysis of this dream (and the fact it's a repeated dream over the last several weeks) that the causal factor must be the toothpaste I use before bed. Yep, that's right. The instigator is toothpaste.

My sister can attest that I complain about toothpaste leaving a film in my mouth afterwards. It really dries out my mouth/throat & leaves a nasty taste all night. I intentionally try to rinse extremely thoroughly after each brush. I thought toothpaste was supposed to refresh you....not for me apparently.

Maybe I'm just going to have to get a new kind. Guess, test, & revise my theory.

Not going to lie, my throat is getting a little choked up as I write & remember....my gag reflex is starting to kick in.

So I'm going to end this now.

**Props to you if you made it to the end of this post!!**

Hmm, something interesting to ponder.

Ten Reasons To NOT Ask Jesus Into Your Heart

Time for an update

I saw Brooke on Sunday and she pointed out that I haven't updated my blog since they wouldn't let me jump out of the plane.


And they ended up letting me jump out of the plane.


So here are some details:

It was all for Emily.


And her big 2-1.


I expected the plane to look something like this: Notice the open back end, the bench to sit on...

But this is the plane we jumped out of:

When I walked up to the hanger the first day, I definitely said either out loud or at least to myself in my head, "Ha ha ha. There's no way that could be our plane. It looks kind of tattered & rusty."

But lo and behold, this was our vessel.

2 jumpers plus the 2 tandem instructors crowded into this small space for the flight over Boone to our altitude of upwards 8000 feet.

Richard & Emily went first:We brought quite a crowd of spectators - and family. It took about 20 minutes for them to reach altitude......but we didn't know it was going to take so long - lots of sore necks from searching the sky.

Richard:Emily:

Round 2 - Joel & I

Don't we look like we're on a mission? (Me, Joel, Hashem, & Mark - our instructors/tandem partners)

Lindsay (me):

All I wanted to accomplish was to do flips in the air while free falling. After a beautiful plane ride over Boone (and I'm not kidding - I loved flying over my hometown!) Joel & Hashem jumped first. Then I had to step outside the plane, hanging on to the bar. Then I tucked my thumbs in the harness & we fell backward into the air. I think we did 1 1/2 flips or so - goal reached!

Here is the dialogue from the remaining portion of my skydiving experience:

Parachute is pulled. Tight pain across my chest & shoulders. Wishing I had a little more wiggle room/freedom. Getting uncomfortable.

A few seconds later -

Mark: How are we doing, Lindsay?

Lindsay: I think I may be hyperventilating a little.
Mark: We'll be on the ground in a few minutes, hang in there.

I'm starting to feel clammy in my arms and rest of my body, feeling a little sweaty & nauseous. Taking deep breaths. Close eyes for a few intermittent moments. Open them to try & enjoy the view.

A little later -

Mark: How're we doing?
Lindsay: I'm feeling nauseous.

Mark: We'll be on the ground in a 3-4 minutes.

He pulls the chute handles, we start spinning in a fast circle. This is supposed to be exhilarating. I want to puke. Close my eyes & hope it stops sooner rather than later.

I hear Mark tell me to lift my knees up. A fraction of a second later I feel tapping against my leg - the signal to pick up my knees for the landing. No time to react, I'm on the ground on my knees.

I had been seeing white, fading spots. Didn't even know we were near the ground. End my skydiving experience.

Wait a few minutes crouched on my hands & knees, my vision returns, the clammy feeling fades away.

"Would you do it again?" I'm asked.

"No." I say....

Now with some perspective & distance from it - I may have a different response. I think I missed out on a good portion of the experience - the view of nearing the ground before you land, that feeling/rush as the ground gets ever closer - I'm pretty sure I was on the verge of passing out and missed that part of the experience. So would I do it again? Maybe someday....

Emily went again 3 days later.

She loved it :)

Happy 21st birthday Emily!!

I'm trying to jump but they won't let me!!

We were supposed to go skydiving at the Boone airport for Emily's birthday on Saturday but the weather did not allow for it. It was extremely cold & the winds were about 20 mph, gusting at 30 mph. They said for us it should stay below 20 mph.

Postponed to last night.

Again, the weather wouldn't allow for it. Too windy.

:(

So we'll try again this coming Saturday.

My sister said it might rain.

Eventually they'll have to let me jump out of a plane.

I've already paid for it & signed my life away (the waivers/authorization/letter that I [actually my family] won't sue if I die, etc.).

And each time I've been to the airport we got to watch video of other jumpers & it made me even more excited & less nervous to make the jump.

Someday.....

This one's for Jess

Hope you're not mad I'm posting this, but I spent my lunch today cleaning out my email inbox & came across the email from December 2007, in which you sent me the following message:

Body of email:

I thought you would like to see what happens when you ask to borrow lotion from a classmate!!!!

Hilarious!!

A quote from Brennan Manning... "The seldom-stated truth is that many of us have a longing for God and an aversion to God. Some of us seek Him and flee Him at the same time."

Oddly, this sums up my heart, my longing, my lonliness, my choices, my fears, my pain, my sin, my joy, my growth, and many other things probably for the season of my life from about 2005-2008 for me....and it may still linger.